The Event | Thee Trinity Creation® e-Manuscript 2999 Everlasting / Master Sage Joseph M

From the skies It came! Briskly walking along the highway gazing up at the stars something struck me from above! It almost knocked me off my feet! There was no sound, no scent, no visible manifestation but It did strike with an astonishing force! I knew not what It was but I knew It had made Its indelible mark on my entire being forever more: The Event had taken place, the Communication complete.

The Miraculous Event of 1988, what exactly was It? So strange how in that instant everything that I Am and will be was. In that instant my entire life, my entire being taken over by a Supreme Energy of Intelligence. In that instant I became “Thee Trinity Creation.” Truth I Am! I could not be anything other.

Yet an event of such incredible magnitude lasted not more that a mere fraction of a second -- It came and It was gone! Dazed and confused but somehow feeling like I had been completely recreated, into who I questioned? How did I even get there? It was around 10:00 p.m. and I was walking along the highway hundreds of miles from home, but where was home?

I was in such total disillusionment in the mid 1980’s, lost to the world and lost to myself. I had genuinely tried to find a better way, I had delved into my Catholic religion but it was not all that I needed. I studied philosophy, psychology and sociology but their insight proved to be inadequate. I learned Transcendental Meditation which was touted as offering tremendous personal and spiritual benefits with little effort involved, nothing but an exaggeration of its true worth although I did succeed at making it somewhat useful to me. I also looked into various New Age and assorted spiritual approaches, subliminal tapes and yoga -- I was still going under and going fast!

I had been an electronics college professor and a professional musician; my family was so proud of me, a college teacher and I was regarded as an excellent drummer even by my peers. I had successfully written a drum technique book and ran a busy drum studio. I studied hard and I worked hard but living just kept stealing the life right out of me. Initially I thought my music career and college position were right for me, in time I discovered they were not, they were only right for what others wanted me to be and what I believed I should be. I was trapped into a life determined by others; I never even knew what was of critical importance to me but I knew I was extremely unhappy and mortally stressed out. I desperately searched and searched finally turning all of my attention to the infinite spiritual realm; I so needed its lasting peace within this world of the transient!

In my new world of suffering I was very alone: no friends, no family, no job, no real home and no vision in life. The extreme emotional hurt that had engulfed me coupled with the soul piercing physical pain was just too much to bear. Totally devastated and so completely isolated within my encapsulating sphere of severe suffering I really had no choice for what I was about to do.

My first “concrete” attempt at ending my life happened in March 1987. I say “concrete” because the anorexia had begun to take its toll on me within every aspect of my waking and even much needed sleeping life but its deadly assault was not as immediate as suicide. Such a horrible time for me, more horrific than anything I could possibly have imagined and yet this was my new reality.

I had been hospitalized for just under a week following my first attack. The purpose was not to end my life at that point although it could easily have been the consequence; I merely wanted to attain a state of comatose lasting several years. Standing on the outside of an overpass guardrail holding on with only one or two fingers a policeman came slowly walking up to me. It was late evening and someone driving by must have called for help. The policeman was gentle of word and said he would not touch me. I believed him, I was very accepting of another’s word. As he spoke softly, stealthily and steadily he kept moving closer and closer. All of a sudden he grabbed me! Not weighing much more than one-hundred pounds he easily pulled me over the railing to safety. Needless to say I was not too impressed with his tricky move and later vowed to myself “I will do it better next time.”

I cried profusely in the police car, exactly why I cannot say? That was the last time I cried. Crying was far too exposing of my personal self and it made me emotionally vulnerable to others. Not until some time after The Event did I shed another tear.

I was admitted to the “Psych Ward.” Amazingly no one realized I had Anorexia Nervosa, not the nurses nor even the doctors. I was extremely good at keeping its secret to myself. I knew by then anorexia had indeed inflicted me but I was not going to let anyone know because it served my yearning for self-destructiveness so very well. I can clearly recall the nurses kidding that they wish they could eat as I did, “like a bird” they would say. Most of them were overweight and they wanted to emulate my sparse way of eating -- they had no idea I was dying inside.

I had asked my mother to drop me off my small blue mat, the very same one that I ended up taking with me on “the long journey.” Laying the mat beside my hospital bed I would do a lot of abdomen intensive exercises disguised as yoga. I had developed a tremendous fear of growing a “pot belly” because my mother always complained to my Dad of having one and demeaned him profusely for it.

To my exhilaration I unexpectedly discovered an exercise bicycle in a small room at the end of the hallway on my floor. I had the bicycle all to myself as no one else was interested in it so I really went at it! I explained to the nurses that the exercise was good for keeping my stress down and they all believed me; not one had any real understanding of what was truly driving me to work out so frantically. During my confining stay in the hospital I successfully suppressed my agitation becoming everything they wanted me to be, hence I was released after a rather short stay of approximately five days.

At the peak of my anorexia, early 1987 through to late 1988, I was physically active at an aerobic level for most of the day and evening, 12 to 14 hours seven-days-a-week. In combination with this strict regiment I would eat as little as I could avoiding foods that were protein based or calorie laden.

Hands are in pockets concealing my using the grip exercisers which you can see poking the material outwards at the bottom.}

What nearly killed me independent of the severe weight loss was the extraordinary guilt I would feel after I “lost it” and “munched out” ravenously. Invariably following a drastic “munch out” I would want to kill myself! Other times I simply could not go on with the prodigious sorrow and excruciating physical pain so I would outright attempt suicide. How did I ever survive all of those close encounters with death? Veritably a profound mystery of life. However I later discovered Who truly saved me.

There were far too many traumatic experiences in that exceedingly dark phase of my life. I can clearly remember one time being so very, very hungry and making the error of drinking alcohol during the daytime. This lowered my “anti-eating” resolve and I went on a totally absurd binging frenzy! Once I began there was no stopping; I went from restaurant-to-restaurant eating burgers, pizza, steak, chicken -- all of the foods I had forbade myself from consuming one right after the other! Then it suddenly ended. My eating madness had come to a close and I could not face what I had done; feeling so very full having consumed all of those calories there was only one solution -- to end my life!

It was only a short walk from the last restaurant through a field to the railroad tracks where I readily located an isolated spot. It was a familiar railway, frequented by both passenger and box car trains. I listlessly spread my body across the tracks instantly feeling extreme relief knowing I would be free of this living horror, my nightmare life. At last a close to the gruelling physical pain and intense emotional suffering I had tolerated far too long. I rested there waiting in peace content it would all be over soon; miraculously a train was not forthcoming. I waited, and waited which allowed me time to realize I did not feel like being splattered all over the place. Reluctantly I rolled off to the side into the brush, a minute or two later a passenger train came whizzing by!

The suicide attempt that summer surpasses all others in my recollection due to its bitter emotional impact upon me! The night prior I had planned my death for noon next day -- I had reached my physical limits. My body was devouring itself! No longer could I go on in such brutal agony; yet incestuously I needed to fuel my anorectic sickness. Complicating things further I required a definite level of fierce body pain to buffer me from the emotional anguish which was absolutely unbearable. How did I ever survive?

I woke up at 9:00 a.m. completely exhausted and in horrific pain, although feeling elated that this was to be my last living day. Three hours to go -- compulsively anorexia forced me to go on a 30 mile bicycle jaunt! Once back in town I stopped off at several drug stores so as to not look suspicious buying numerous bottles of sleeping pills. Immediately after I dropped off my bike at home: a spider infested, dusty, musty smelling boot-wearing-wet basement of my parents’ house. I then hurriedly walked to a nearby bar. They all opened at noon. I downed handfuls of pills with my beer, no one seemed to pay much attention to me.

Finishing my lunch of fifty pills or more I buoyantly wandered about the streets. Finally feeling sleep coming on I headed towards home, however as I got close I suddenly and involuntarily began shaking like a leaf. To my surprise my father was sitting in the shade drinking his beer near the only outside entrance to the basement. I was stunned! Seeing my condition he angrily called me over and lamented, “What crazy thing did you do now?” Since he really did not want to get involved I easily shrugged him off and quickly headed downstairs.

While in the basement sleep was not imminent! Again this gave me time to realize I did not want to die. But what was I to do? I could not once more bother my parents with what I had done and I certainly did not want to return to the hospital! Frantically I started downing gallons of water and prayed intensely that I would not die -- it was all so terrifyingly freaky!

Eventually hearing my repugnant vomiting sounds my mother came down to see what was going on, it would have been around 6 p.m. Still trembling I described to her what I had done and that I might not survive. Her response to me was a dagger through my heart! “Well, just stay here and when I get back from bingo I’ll come down and see how you’re doing.” Sure enough when she returned from her bingo a few hours later she came down to check on me. Incredibly still alive and awake, we agreed going to the hospital might be best. She then called my uncle who willingly gave us a ride.

Upon our arrival I was immediately admitted, they handed me charcoal to drink and rushed me to the Intensive Care Unit. I loved intensive care because I really felt “cared for.” After a day of sleeping and another day of extensive monitoring I was moved to the “Psych Ward” before being released a few days later.

There were several other attempted suicides: walking out in front of a fast moving transport truck, ingesting prescribed Antabuse with alcohol and eating randomly picked wild mushrooms on many occasions. Furthermore there was always the torment of anorexia hanging over me like a looming death sentence. Gradually I started to open up my heart and mind to the Energy of Life itself and inconceivably His Unbounded Pure Eternal Love slowly began to supersede my pervasive zeal of wanting to die. I begged and I prayed intensely for the crucial answers to my dire life questions:
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Why is this happening to me? What have I done to deserve such suffering? How can I ever go back into the World of the normal everyday? What is my life really worth? How long need I endure this pain?

Instead of receiving direct answers I began to feel deep within myself the hurt and pain of those in past who had suffered, and of those of present who are in suffering. For the first time ever in my entire life I truly felt real compassion towards others beyond my own needs. I felt their agony merge with mine; I fully accepted it so that I may give them relief. It was personally comforting to know and feel what others had to endure, I was so very close to them. I experienced love as not ever before and no longer was I so alone. In my union with others my thoughts and questions evolved from self-centered ones to those of life itself:
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I realized I could not go back into the world without these fundamental answers. I needed to know! I needed life wisdom. I needed spiritual understanding. I prayed with even more heart than ever before, not merely for myself but to be there for others. I prayed and I prayed in complete abandonment; I gave myself totally to the Infinite Intelligent Energy of Life, to the Creator: to God!

Rapidly walking looking up at the night sky pleading for answers I would leave this earth and unite with the Creator. During these enlightening short time frames lasting minutes, definitely not hours, I was free of all emotional and physical pain: free of all the burdens my body had to endure, free of my little thinking self. I became One with the Eternal Energy of Life. Undeniably I knew there was an Eternal Life Energy of Supreme Love and Intelligence, of Perfection in Being but I could not sustain our Unity. I would fall back down to earth to the pain and suffering. Desolated I would head off to a bar and drink until I was ready to sleep; I was so exhausted it did not take much. Waking early in the morning I began my extreme exercise routine that lasted most of the day and evening. I was still not free, not yet.

A fervent compulsion overtook me with the knowing I must leave. In my heightened transcendent state of mind which came in bursts sometimes during my prayer, while walking gazing up at the stars or just spontaneously I began asking “Where am I to go?” The signs started to appear. While walking bits of paper would catch my attention, perhaps the song of a bird or the rustling of the wind through the leaves: all slight clues as to my destination.

Sunday, running in at my aunt’s place a newspaper caught my attention. Large heading letters called out to me spelling something, it was only a few letters but suddenly the awakening stuck me! I was go to Toronto! Why? I could not say for certain but I knew I must leave. The very same day my long journey began; Toronto was approximately 400 miles west of where I lived. It was mid-day, I packed extremely light and began to walk, yes walk the distance!

It was summer 1988 and my very first night out a powerful storm hit! There I was out along the side of the highway walking in the midst of deafening thunder and lightening that ruptured the sky. I finally found shelter in an abandoned apartment building. Already discouraged I desperately questioned, “What am I doing here?” I made a quick call from a nearby phone to my separated wife who had been occupying our newly built house since Christmas Eve 1986. I reached out to her but all that happened was the usual, I was criticized profusely for my pilgrimage and demeaned, ridiculed and degraded. Well I was not about to go back to that horrible marriage, nor to the appalling living conditions of my parents’ basement. I reluctantly returned to my shelter.

Next morning came an intense heat wave, the sun was merciless, temperatures hovered in the high 90 degree range but I nevertheless walked, and walked, and walked. Easy it was not! I didn’t carry any food or water with me which kept my backpack light and provided me with the added impetus hastily propelling me forward to the next town.

At night I would find a spot to sleep wherever I could; all I had with me in sleeping gear was my very thin blue yoga mat. My sleeping quarters were a house in process of being built, behind a business that was closed and even a graveyard. At dawn I woke and continued on my journey. This went on for five days, on the fifth day, which was a Thursday, something happened that disturbed my normal pattern of settling in early evening and kept me going on further than I usually would have.

In one of the small towns I passed through there were a couple of guys who were heckling me and following me with their car. They came and they went, called me names, and came and went again. As darkness was falling they were still around; I knew that if I settled somewhere and those guys found me I would probably get beaten and robbed, so I continued walking along the highway where I felt safest. After walking for a couple of hours I approached Kingston, a small metropolitan area. Periodically I would gaze up at the night sky. The stars were shinning bright, the moon appeared to be full; it was so beautiful, so grand -- a physical expression of the magnificence of life.

My walking was rapid and my body movements distorted due to the physical pain I had to endure, therefore I would continually shift my body position to change the muscles that were being worked. I can imagine I must have looked strange to those who passed me by but it was a very practical way of keeping myself going without my muscles cramping up. I was right in the middle of a body shift while looking up at the stars in wonderment when in an instant it happened: The Event.

"It almost knocked me off my feet! There was no sound, no scent, no visible manifestation but It did strike with an astonishing force!"

An instantaneous flash and It was over! I realize due to the extreme limitations of the human brain had It been any longer than an instant total burn out would have occurred. In that moment I was completely transformed into Thee Trinity Creation, thrust into what this Energy wanted me to be. I had no choice. Who I am today and of that evening is what I was created into. This is my rebirth into a superior being of heightened consciousness. My life mission was completely infused within me, my earthly end destined and eternal life forever mine. I was saved but unaware of the tremendous challenges that would ensue!

Bewildered I nevertheless continued my walk into Kingston. Being emotionally and physically weakened I chose a hotel to stay the night, I had won two hundred dollars that morning on a lottery ticket which I purchased prior to leaving on my journey. To my bafflement Friday morning my motivation to continue was almost nil, I did go on although everything was very different. To journey forth now was so arduous and of little meaning.

On Sunday evening approximately half way to Toronto I wearily decided to return “home”. It was getting dark so I hastily headed out to the larger four lane highway in an attempt to hitchhike a ride. I was enervated, night was falling but I continued walking along the highway, anorexia kept me moving. A ride was not forthcoming, I was despaired. Everywhere I looked all I could see was swamp, where was I ever to sleep? I was very disappointed in the Energy that had called me on this journey and infused me the night of The Event. I complained to It profusely. Just when I was about to collapse from total exhaustion, walking completely bent over and at any moment ready to fall face first to the ground I was tossed a lifesaver -- the ride! A car pulled off the road just in front of me. I could hardly believe it! The Energy had not let me down! I felt so alone in that moment prior but I then realized I was not alone by any means, the Energy was with me all along. Amazingly all it took was that one ride, approximately 5 hours later I was back home, back to the dreadful basement of my parents’ place.

Thee Trinity Creation®

Master Sage Joseph Eugene (M)orin

"The World becomes Enlightened to the TRUTH(33).

This is my Life Vision.

This is why I AM(47)! "

e-Manuscript 2999 Everlasting©

Chapters

1) Many a Heartfelt Appreciation {The Numbers speak for themselves...}

2) A Passion Ignited: Rosalie {Passion within Living words!}

3) The Event {The MIRACULOUS Communication is made!}

4) The Revelation {The Communication is excruciatingly Released to Consciousness...}

5) Numbers/Letters Full Exposure {Every Number Meaning is fully explained!}

6) 33 Real Life Communications {People like yourself who have been guided unto a Better Way!}

7) Self Empowering Meditation® {Perhaps the Finest Meditation in the World!}

8) 33 Truths of the Everyday {A guide to enhance the Truth you live daily...}

9) The Eternal Truth {Your Eternal Home of Perfection and Bliss}

10) Upon Us {What awaits Us when Truth becomes lost...}

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My Dear Wife Rosalie on our very Special Honeymoon, October 2002.

Now we have 3 Magnificent boys with the fourth due July 3rd, 2010.

Master Sage Eugene,

I am so grateful for everything you have done. I am waiting for my check and then I will show my appreciation, I look forward to receiving your manuscript.

Grace

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The Celestial Communication of 1988

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